I love sleep. I adore sleep. I NEED sleep.
I heart it mucho. Unfortunately, I don't get to experience it nearly enough.
I'm often confused and uncomprehending of people who tell me they have trouble sleeping at night.
No offense intended if that's you. In fact if that is you, have I got a deal for you! It's a once in a lifetime deal, never to be repeated - unless it is.
I have found the cure to insomnia. Forget the pills, the sleep-aids, or the crazy things that you may have found yourself doing to get forty winks.
Here's the cure: For a limited time, I'm offering you (my lucky readers) the chance to rent my children, either all four or one at a time.
100% Satisfaction Guaranteed!
These four little people are the best sleep-aid I have ever found! Plus, they're pretty darn cute. It's a win-win situation.
In fact, I'll even give you one satisfied customer's review:
"These children are so great for inducing sleep! No pills needed here. At first, I wasn't sure if it was working. However, at bedtime, I did a little experiment. I wanted to see how high I could count before completely losing consciousness. I counted one......two................three........ I wasn't even able to finish saying I love you to my hubby. These kids really work!"
See? Told ya.
Do I have any takers?
*These findings have not been confirmed by the FDA. They don't have to be. We parents have been experiencing this since Creation.